Fatal Misunderstanding
by Lithwen
Summary: Someone hears something they weren't meant to hear, and thinks it means something it doesn't.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: My lawyers have just informed me that I don't own FF8 or any of it's characters. 

Author's notes: I had to repost. Something was screwed up the first time I posted. 

Fatal Misunderstanding

Chapter.1 

BEEP!, BEEP! ,BEEP!!

The shrill sound of his alarm clock jarred him awake at six o'clock. Groaning, Squall shut it off and looked over at Rinoa. She was sleeping peacefully, and he decided not to wake her. After all, she didn't need to wake up until eight, since her first class wasn't until nine thirty.

Squall smiled, remembering how happy his girlfriend had been when she had not only been made a SeeD, but also been given her instructors license. She now taught advanced magic, and History of the Sorceress. Squall, on the other hand, taught gunblade skills to the five students who had decided to learn to use the complicated weapon. He was also commander of the Garden, meaning he had to be up early to be sure everything was going as planned.

He got dressed, ran a comb through his hair, and then headed down to the cafeteria. As always, Zell was there waiting for him. "Hey Squall," the martial artist shouted from across the cafeteria, "We still on for the training center?"

Squall nodded at him and grabbed some food from the counter. Looking around, he saw that none of his other friends were around, so he went to sit by Zell. "I thought you didn't have to teach until eight," he remarked, "Don't tell me you got up this early just so I could kick your ass."

Zell smirked. "Nah, I promised Kia Monroe I'd help her work on her skills before class. She has a lot of talent, her worst problem is balance. I swear, that girl is the clumsiest person I've ever met."

Squall smiled. Since he had let Zell take over hand to hand combat classes, there had been a rise in student visits to the infirmary, but Zell had become a popular teacher, and totally devoted to his students. Squall could name at least four girls with a crush on him, and quite a few boys who had tried giving themselves tattoos on their faces. Then again, there were just as many people who admired Squall, but he chose to ignore them.

Quistis came to their table then and greeted them with a tired groan. "Uggg... I don't wanna work today," she whined, "I was up all night arranging to have twelve Trabia students transfer here for their SeeD exams. Squall, can I quit?"

Squall pretended to consider. "Hmm..can the Headmistress of Balamb garden quit, therefore leaving me with the responsibility of finding a new one, and taking over in the mean time? Umm.. No."

Quistis sighed. "Oh well, I tried," she said, trying to sound upset. Everyone knew Quistis loved her job at Headmistress of the Garden, and did a much better job of it than Squall would have.

When Cid had turned the Garden over to Squall, the antisocial teen had tried running it for only a week before appointing Quistis. She dealt with discipline, announcements, and students, he dealt with SeeD, from everything to dispatching them to help in other countries, to the SeeD exams, which had gotten harder since the defeat of Ultimecia. Irvine and Rinoa had been made SeeDs, and almost all of his friends were instructors, except Irvine, who chose to stay as a simple field SeeD, and obviously enjoyed it. Squall finished his coffee and stood up. Zell followed him. "See ya Quisty," Zell said over his shoulder, "Gotta go let Squall get acquainted with my fists."

The two guys headed for the training center. When they got there, Squall pulled out his gunblade and Zell slipped on his gloves. They ignored the group of about ten students who had shown up to watch. Squall didn't fight as well as he could have. He knew that, with a weapon like a gunblade going against nothing but fists, only a weak warrior would use their gunblade to it's full potential. When Zell surprised him with a kick to the head, Squall retaliated by slashing at him in a smooth upwards movement. A huge rip appeared in Zell's shirt, but Squall was careful to not even scratch the skin. As Zell ripped his shirt off to fight better, Squall heard the sighs from the girls in the audience. He glanced quickly at his watch, and saw that it was already seven. He jerked his eyes back up just in time to see a fist coming straight at his face. Without thinking, he blocked it with his gunblade, then followed through on the move and threw Zell to the ground.

"I almost had you," Zell sighed, "You lost your concentration, but nice recovery."

"Yeah," Squall replied, "We should hit the showers, I have less than half an hour before I have to brief some SeeDs on a mission." He held his hand out to pull Zell up, and immediately found himself face first in the dirt. "Dirty trick," he told Zell, trying to look annoyed but failing, "You'll pay for that tomorrow Dincht."

Zell only shrugged and left the training center, leaving Squall to brush off the dirt and tell the students to either start practicing or leave the training center. 

When Squall entered his Dorm, Rinoa was still sleeping. He walked into the bathroom for a shower, flinching at the temperature. The hot water had been screwing up lately, so that sometimes it would be freezing, and sometimes there would be a sudden rush of scalding hot water, but this was ridiculous. He turned the water all the way down, so that it should, according to common sense, be freezing, but it wouldn't get any colder. The heat was almost unbearable, but he put up with it long enough to wash his hair, then jumped out, and felt his legs and arms get goose bumps as his hot body hit the cold air of the dorm. He changed again, thankful that he had bought another pair of leather pants last week, since the pair he had been wearing had gotten a lot of dirt on them when he fell, and walked over to the bed. 

Leaning over, he shook Rinoa's shoulder. She rolled over, and looked at him. "What time is it?" she asked.

Surprised that she hadn't greeted him with her usual joking complaint about waking up, he took a moment before replying, "five after seven. I know it's early, I just wanted to say have a good day. You'll meet me for lunch, right?"

"Probably," she replied, then asked, "Did anyone call last night?" He shook his head, and she said, "Ok then, well, see you at lunch," then rolled over and went back to sleep.

Squall left for the mission briefing, trying to push her lack of enthusiasm to the back of his mind. Maybe she was just a bit sick, or hadn't gotten much sleep last night. Either way, Squall shrugged it off. He had work to do. 

End of Chapter.1

Pointless babble: Well, I've been having a great day. First, I got up to go to work (volunteer work at a pet store actually) and realized my shoes were soaked, thanks to my ever so kind friend throwing them in the ocean yesterday. So I threw them in the dryer. They weren't dry in time for work, so I had to wear these beat up dirty sneakers that were practically falling off my feet. I got to work and just to make my day perfect, I find out that the new owners decided to get rid of volunteers, and it's my last day. There was nothing to do, so I came home. Then I realized that my shoes still weren't dry, and the dryer was a mess. I hadn't realized there was sand in them too. SO I cleaned the dryer, and went to check on my reviews. SUPRISE SURPRISE! NONE!!! (well, except some I got three days ago) I checked my stats and realized that, although I had uploaded five chapters, it only said there were two. SO now I'm reposting. Thanks to the 6 people who reviewed my story, you're all cool. And sorry, for complaining, I'm just having a real crappy day.

Author's notes: I'll have the first five chapters posted by tomorrow at the latest. then I can finally start on ch.6 


	2. Chapter 2

Fatal Misunderstanding

Chapter 2

At twelve thirty, Squall looked up from the request for help he was reading and glanced at the clock. He skimmed the request one more time, then put it in the paper shredder, deciding it wasn't worth the time. Then he stood up and headed for the cafeteria to meet Rinoa for lunch.

As he was approaching the corridor, Selphie walked by. "Hey Squall! Rinoa's in there. What happened to you? You're limping."

Squall smiled a bit and replied, 'If you can believe it, a student actually got one over on me in class. I got distracted for a second, and when I finally snapped out of it and tried to dodge his gunblade at, I tripped. I avoided the slash, but I twisted my ankle. My students will never let me live this down." 

Selphie giggled, and replied, "Don't tell Zell. He's already bragging about how **_he_** beat you in the training center this morning."

"He didn't beat me," Squall replied, "The battle was over already when he flipped me. And it was a cheap shot too"  
Selphie laughed and walked away, heading, Squall assumed, for Irvine's dorm. He brushed a strand of brown hair out of his face, reminding himself to get it cut when they stopped a FH to get the water heater repaired, and walked into the cafeteria.

"Hey Squall!" Rinoa called from the table she was at, "Over here!" Squall was pleased to see that she looked like her usual happy self. She was smiling, and, unlike that morning, she looked really happy to see him.

He went over, and kissed her cheek, then looked around to make sure no one was watching. She laughed, and he asked, "So, did you manage to burn the ends of your hair again?"

One Rinoa's first day teaching advanced magic, she had been so excited that her attempt to show the class a Firaga spell had gone completely wrong. Everyone, especially Squall, never missed an opportunity to tease her about it. Rinoa stuck her tongue out at him playfully, and he sat down.

They talked for a while, and Squall decided she had probably just been really tired that morning. But just to make sure, he asked, "Rinoa, are you feeling ok? You seemed a bit out of it this morning."

She looked at him, and for a moment he thought he saw tears in her eyes, but she just snapped, "Of course I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?"

She stomped off, leaving her food on her plate, virtually untouched. Squall stared after her, and when she got to the door, she stopped, as if she was going to say something. But she apparently changed her mind and walked out. 

Squall got up from the table and left. He was confused, and he figured if anyone knew what was going on, it would be Selphie. Of course, she probably wouldn't want him interrupting her. He paused at the hall leading to the dorms, then shook his head. He'd ask her later. 

There was still an hour until lunch ended, so he headed for the training center, hoping to meet a T-rexaur to take out his frustration on. After defeating eight Grats, he finally found one. But while he fought it, his mind wandered, as it had during Gunblade practice, and he found himself thinking about Rinoa, not about the battle. The monster bore down on him, and this time when he looked up, it was too late to dodge. He only managed to cover his face with his arm. It was enough to save his life, and he finished the battle with a Renzokuken, but his arm was pretty badly hurt. He tried casting cure, but it didn't help much. He'd have to head to the infirmary. 

As Doctor Kadowaki bandaged him up, she shook her head. "You, Squall, of all people, should know better than to head to the training center with no more than one or two weak cure spells."

"I know," he told her, 'I thought I had some Curagas. And normally, I wouldn't have needed them anyway." He sighed, reminding himself that this was the third time he had lost concentration today. He must need a vacation, or at least a bit of time off. 

He thanked the doctor and left her office, heading for the elevator. When he got there, Quistis was just coming down. "I was just coming to see you," he told her, "I hate to ask, but do you think Zell or someone could take over for me this afternoon? I don't have any classes, just that meeting with that representative of Esthar. Nothing major, they just want some SeeD protection at the President's birthday party next month. I've told them they'll get it, but they want a meeting just to go over one or two things." 

Quistis looked at his face and said, "Yeah, you do look sort of tired. Sure, I'm sure either Zell or Selphie will take over. You know Selphie, she'll want to know all about how Laguna's doing." Squall thanked her, and began to walk away, but.. "Squall?" He turned back, "Is there anything wrong? I mean, you do look a bit tired, but you mostly just look...stressed, like there's something on your mind." 

Squall started to tell her it was none of her business, then sighed. There was no point, it would only prove her suspicions. So instead he asked, "Quistis, you and Rinoa are pretty good friends right?" She nodded. "Well, have you noticed she's been acting a bit strange? You know, not her usual self?"

She looked confused but replied, "No, I haven't really, but I've just been so busy. Why? Did you get in a fight?"

"Not exactly," Squall replied, "Thanks though, and tell whoever takes over the meeting that, if the president requests my presence, which I know he will, I'll attend, but, for the last time, I will not, under any circumstances, call him 'Daddy'."

She laughed, and Squall walked back to his dorm, hoping to get a few hours sleep. As he lay down on his bed and closed his eyes, he thought, 'Just let this all be over when I wake up.'

~~~~~~~~~~

He didn't sleep very long. When he woke up, the sun hadn't even begun to set. Looking at his clock, he realized that classes were over, and he wondered if he should go find Rinoa. He wasn't sure what he should do. As far as he knew, asking if someone felt all right wasn't a crime, but he had realized that women, especially Rinoa, expected apologies for everything, even if it was something as simple as leaving the toilet seat up. Then again, he may have changed a lot, but not that much. He wasn't so bad about sharing feelings, he admitted when he cared fore someone, and he even had a pretty good sense of humor. But if there was one thing that hadn't changed- and never would, he told himself stubbornly- it was that Squall Leonhart, was **_not_** the kind of person who apologized without good cause.

Then again, the other part of his brain, the part that was hopelessly in love, argued, if he wouldn't apologize to the girl he loved, what was he doing with her? Unfortunately for the stubborn side of his brain, this argument won out, and Squall left the dorm to find Rinoa, who he knew would be at the Quad with Selphie.

As he came down the stairs, he heard her voice and stopped. "I hate to do it," she was saying, sounding slightly upset, "but I've got to let go now before it gets any harder." Wondering what she was talking about, Squall listened some more. "It's pretty much over anyway," she continued, "It's obvious that even if I don't do it, he won't last much longer." 

A knot formed in Squall's stomach. He remembered hearing a conversation like this between two girls, right before one of them dumped her boyfriend. But then again, Rinoa loved him, she wouldn't dump him, would she?

Rinoa continued, "We've been through so much together, but it's like, I know it's for the best, and it'll be better for both of us."

Squall had just begun to think that it couldn't be any more obvious he was getting dumped when Selphie replied, "Yeah, I'm not sure Squall will see it that way though." 

End of Chapter 2

Author's notes: Yay, soon it will get really angsty. Angst fics are the perfect cure for depression.


	3. Chapter 3

Discalimer: (I forgot one for ch2, so this applies for that too) I don't own FF8. I'm too depressed to say something funny.

Fatal Misunderstanding

Chapter 3

An hour later, Squall was feeling more depressed than he had ever thought possible. He just couldn't figure out why Rinoa wanted to end the relationship. It must be his fault, but what had he done wrong?

He went over the possibilities in his head, and none of them made sense. It wasn't his lack of commitment, that was for sure. When Rinoa had mentioned marriage a few months ago, he had agreed that it was a good idea. And it wasn't that he was moving to fast either. He hadn't pressured her into anything, but waited until she was ready. There was one other reason in his head, but unless she was the best actress ever, he knew he was satisfying her in bed. 

'But maybe someone else is even better' replied the small, annoying voice in the back of his head. 'After all, with all the guys in Balamb garden, you didn't think she'd be loyal forever, did you?'

But that was exactly what he had thought. And what he still thought. Rinoa just wasn't the cheating type. So what could it be?

He guessed it didn't matter. For whatever reason, it was over. She would probably come to his dorm later that night, and tell him they needed to talk. She'd say something like, "It's not you, it's me," or "I just don't think it's working out." And then of course, she'd tell him, "I still want to be friends," and he would agree. But they wouldn't be friends. They would feel uncomfortable around each other, and eventually, would completely forget each other.

At least, that was what he wanted to happen. He wanted to just forget her, and move on. Maybe get another girlfriend, and eventually marry her. But he knew it wouldn't happen. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't accept the fact that he would have to live without Rinoa. 'You shouldn't be surprised,' spoke up the voice in his head, 'After all, no one you care about ever stays with you. And once you and Rinoa break up, Zell, Selphie, Quistis, and the rest of them will all take her side, and you'll be completely alone again.'

The thought shouldn't have upset him. He'd been alone, and doing fine, until he became a SeeD, and he had continued thinking he didn't need anyone right up until the battle with Ultimecia. So why was it that now, when he thought of losing everyone again, he felt tears brimming in the corners of his eyes?

He wiped the tears away, and turned off his light. It was only seven o'clock, and he hadn't eaten since lunch, but he didn't care. He just wanted to go to sleep and forget everything. In fact, he realized, what the really wanted was to go to sleep and not wake up.

~~~~~

He didn't get what he wanted. He did wake up, at exactly nine thirty the next morning. It was Saturday, so there were no classes. It was a good thing too, because he knew there was no way he could concentrate today. 

He was supposed to be meeting Zell in the training center after lunch, but there was no way he could face anyone today. In fact, there was no way he was going to leave his dorm. It was the only place where he could be sure of not seeing Rinoa. 

The phone rang, and he picked it up. "Hello sir," said a voice on the other end, "Would you like to buy..." Squall hung up. A second later, it rang again. "I'm sorry, we got disconnected," the voice said, "As I was saying.."

"Fuck off," Squall told the man, before hanging up again. The man apparently got the message, because the phone stayed silent. Squall sat on his bed, wondering what to do. He walked over to his closet, to get some clothes. But even dressing seemed like too much effort. Everything did. So he just fell back on the bed, and lay there, trying to think.

Why was it bothering him so much? He was supposed to be the antisocial jerk who pushed everyone away. He wasn't supposed to care, and he **_definitely _**wasn't supposed to be lying on his bed in his boxers, too depressed to do anything, just because his girlfriend was leaving him. 

He tried to snap out of it, but couldn't. There were too many memories. The SeeD graduation ball, the time he had carried her away from Balamb garden on his back when she was in a coma, realizing he loved her and going into space to save her, and, most of all, the kiss they had shared during the celebration party after time compression. 

He wished that he hadn't made the decision to stop using Guardian forces. If he had kept them, maybe he wouldn't remember, and maybe he'd be able to shrug this off, like he had with so many other things. 

He tried to convince himself it wasn't the end of the world. After all, that was life. As long as you were alive, bad things would happen. 'Then again,' spoke up the pathetically annoying voice in the back of his mind, 'Once you stop living, the bad things stop.' 

For once, that pathetic little voice had said something worth listening to.

End of Chapter 3

Author's notes: It's been a whole six minutes since I wrote the author's notes for chapter two, and I'm still depressed. Even my usual depression cure (listening to "bodies" by drowning pool) isn't working. Maybe I'll try some Eminem. Oh by the way, I don't own any of those songs or artists.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: (I'm trying for a serious one here) Final Fantasy Eight, along with it's characters, belong to Squaresoft. And being the big meanies that they are, they refuse to share with me. (Oh well, I tried)

Author's notes: My depression is slowly leaving me. I should be fine by chapter five.

Fatal Misunderstanding

Chapter 4

****

Squall's eyes drifted over to his gunblade. It would be so easy to just slit his wrists, or stab himself. So easy to end all his problems. But could he do it? And did he want to?

He walked across the room and picked the weapon off the floor. He traced the engraving with his finger, remembering all the damage he had done with the gunblade. He had killed so many people and monsters that he had lost count. The gunblade had taken so many lives, so what was one more?

He argued with himself, trying to decided whether or not to do it. He knew that without Rinoa, his life would be miserable. He'd have no reason to live. But he still wasn't convinced. After all, Rinoa hadn't told him yet. Maybe she'd changed her mind. And even if she hadn't, the truth was that he didn't want to die this way. When he died, he wanted it to be in battle, or from natural causes. If he killed himself, it would be talked about for a long time. Everyone would mourn his death, but they would have their own theories and opinions about what had happened. Some would claim that he had obviously been mentally unstable to do something like that, and others would lose any respect they had ever had for him. Hadn't he told the students in his gunblade class just last week that suicide was a coward's way out? 

But the truth was, he was a coward. He didn't want to face Rinoa, or any of his friends, again. He didn't want to live a life without the only person he'd ever loved. 

A tear dripped down his cheek, and he brushed it away angrily. He ran his finger over the blade, cutting his finger and watching as a line of blood appeared on the metal. Looking at his finger, he saw how quickly the blood ran out, covering his entire hand. If he cut his wrist, he would bleed to death so quickly that he probably wouldn't have time to regret it. It would be fast and easy. He could do it in the shower, so that he wouldn't stain the carpet of the dorm. As that thought entered his head, he laughed a bit. Here he was, planning on killing himself, and all he could think of was not getting blood on the carpet. 

He wiped his finger on his shirt, and held it tightly until the bleeding had mostly stopped. Then he looked over at the picture of Rinoa he had on his desk. He couldn't just kill himself. She would be heartbroken. 'No she won't,' spoke up the voice once again, 'She's dumping you, remember?' 

He knocked the picture off the desk, suddenly angry, then picked up his gunblade. He considered writing a note, but the little bitch didn't deserve one. She could figure it out herself.

~*~

Rinoa pulled into the school parking lot and got out of her car, wiping her eyes. She had just been to the vet, getting Angelo put to sleep. It had been hard, but she knew it had been the right thing to do. He had gotten sick a year ago, and his condition had continued to worsen until he was unable to even move.

The vet had scolded her for holding off so long, but when she had considered it before, Squall had convinced her not to. He had told her that putting an animal to sleep, unless it was rabid, was murder, plain and simple. Back then, Angelo had still been able to walk. 

But when he got worse, she knew she had to do it. She hadn't told Squall, or anyone else except Selphie, her best friend. Now she was going to tell him. She didn't think he'd be mad. He'd probably comfort her, and tell her that she had done the right thing.

She wiped a tear from the corner of her eye and smiled a bit. Despite his attempts to seem completely emotionless, she knew he loved her, and that he had even liked Angelo a lot. He'd be almost as sad as she was.

Then again, she was still dreading telling him. When she had told Selphie, her friend had replied, "Yeah, I'm not sure Squall will see it that way though." It worried her. Maybe Selphie was right. Would Squall be mad? Would he dump her? She didn't think so, but she couldn't be sure.

"Oh well," she sighed, "If it's gonna happen then it's gonna happen." With that she left the parking lot and headed towards the dorms.

~*~

Squall stepped into the shower, flinching at the water temperature, and looked at his wrists. He lightly traced a path across one with his finger, then sighed. He was hesitating. He didn't know why, it wasn't as if he had any reason to not do it. It just suddenly seemed like a bad idea. Shaking his head, he gripped the gunblade firmly, and quickly drew it across his left wrist, then his right one. He stared in amazement as the blood ran out. He hadn't known it was possible to bleed this much or this quickly. 

As Squall watched the blood mix in with the water and flow down the drain, he was suddenly hit by reality. That was _his_ blood, dripping out of _his _wrists. This wasn't a movie. The blood, the gunblade, and everything else were real. He wasn't going to simply perform this scene and then get up and walk away unharmed. He was actually going to die. He looked around, panicking, and trying to find something to stop the bleeding. But the sudden movement, along with the blood loss, made him weak, and he passed out.

End of Chapter 4

Author's notes: Ok, I think I'm pretty much better. Now I'm just mad. I've actually been there longer than almost everybody at the pet store. Three years and they just throw you out on your ass. Oh well, anyway, please review.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own FF8. Nope. Nothing.

Author's notes: hehehehe...Read the fine print. I HAVE CONQUERED DISCLAIMERS!! Never more will they take up space with their annoying legal boring stuff. Simply use really tiny font, and you'll barely notice them. In fact, put them at the bottom, that's even better. Suck on THAT lawyers. In case you can't tell, I'm not depressed no more ^_^

Fatal Misunderstanding

Chapter 5

Rinoa stopped in front of Squall's door. She could hear water running. "He must be having a shower," she muttered, and tried the door. It was unlocked. She walked in, and sat down on the bed. She'd just wait for him to come out. She sighed, and made herself comfortable. When he could, Squall liked to have really long showers, so she'd be waiting for a while. 

Rinoa looked around, trying to find something to occupy herself with. She found the remote control under Squall's pillow, and turned on the TV. Soon she was absorbed in a soap opera, and completely forgot about her own problems as she watched a cheating boyfriend try to work things out with his two girls. 

It wasn't until half an hour later that Rinoa finally realized the water was still running. Something in the back of her mind told her something was wrong, but she refused to listen to it. Maybe Squall had gotten something on him that was really hard to get off. She smiled as she remembered the time Zell had been fooling around and squirted an entire bottle of ketchup in Squall's hair. He had been in the shower for over an hour trying to get it out. 

She turned back to the TV, but saw that the show was over. Glancing around, she saw that Squall's dorm was a bit of a mess. "Ok then," she sighed, "I guess I'll just straighten things up. Then he might not be as mad when I tell him about Angelo." It was a stupid thought, and she knew it, but she had to do something to take her mind off things.

She picked up a picture lying face down on the floor, and was surprised to see that it was a picture of her, taken during a trip to Dollet last summer. She replaced in on the desk from which it must have fallen, then picked up a few other things. As she was cleaning, she got some ink on her shirt.

"Crap!" she exclaimed, and walked over to the sink in the corner of the room. She turned on the water lightly, so she wouldn't disturb Squall's shower, and gasped when she felt the freezing cold temperature. She washed the ink off her shirt, then paused. She had just remembered the water heater. Squall had announced that due to the water problems, students and instructors had to limit their water use. So why had he been in the shower so long? And how could he stand the cold?

Rinoa paled. What if the water had gotten to cold or too hot? "Shit!" she exclaimed in a scared voice. The possibilities flowed through her head. He could have been scalded badly by the water, or been sent into shock when it suddenly got to cold. What if he had fallen and been knocked out? She had heard of people drowning in the shower. 

Rinoa ran to the bathroom door and tried to open it. It was locked. Knocking as loud as she could, Rinoa shouted, "Squall? Are you in there?" There was no answer. "Squall!? Answer me! Are you ok?" There was still no answer.

Rinoa ran out of the dorm and across the hall. She banged on the door to Zell's dorm until he came out, looking irritated. "What...Rinoa!? What's wrong?" Tears were running down Rinoa's cheeks as she told him. "Ok, "I'm coming," he told her, sounding worried. 

~*~

When they got back to Squall's dorm, Zell shouted, "Yo,Squall!" It was loud enough that any conscious person inside the bathroom would have heard him, no matter how loud the water was. "Ok," Zell said in his normal voice, "I'm breaking down the door."

Rinoa nodded and stepped away. Zell kicked in the door and then turned back to Rinoa, nursing his sore foot. When he saw the shocked look on her face, which had gone completely white, he followed her eyes to the bathtub. "Holy shit," was all he could manage before lapsing into a shocked silence.

Rinoa began to walk into the bathroom, but Zell stopped her. He walked in first, wanting more than anything to look away, but unable to take his eyes off the site in front of him. 

Squall lay in the bathtub, the water beating down on him. The first thing Zell had noticed was that Squall still had his boxers on, but it soon became apparent that the boxers were not the reason Rinoa looked ready to faint. Squall's gunblade lay on the floor beside the tub, blood staining the edge of the blade. Blood which had obviously come from the form now lying on the porcelain bottom of the tub. Zell forced himself to walk over and turn the water off. Looking down at Squall's lifeless body, he understood what had happened. The water running down the drain was tinted a light pink, which he knew had earlier been a dark shade of crimson. The lacerations on each of Squall's wrist told Zell all he needed to know: Squall had killed himself. 

Just to be sure Squall was really dead, although he knew he was, Zell checked his pulse. Nothing. "Rinoa...he's..." Zell couldn't bring himself to finish.

"NO!" Rinoa shouted, but she knew it was true, "She collapsed on the floor outside the bathroom, crying.

Zell was still in shock, but he knew he had to get help. He closed the bathroom door behind him, decided against trying to get Rinoa to move, and walked out of the dorm. When he got out, he began to run towards the elevator. On the way he saw Irvine.   
"Hey Zell, what's wrong?" Irvine asked, wondering why the normally happy teen looked ready to cry.

"Irvine, go stand by the door to Squall's dorm. Don't go in, and make sure no one else does either."

"But why..." Irvine began, but Zell was already gone. Shrugging his shoulder, Irvine walked down the hall towards the dorms. 

Zell continued running, and when he got to the elevator he pushed the button for the top floor. When it arrived, Zell rushed into Quistis's office, slamming the door behind him.

"Zell!? What's wrong?" Quistis asked, looking up from her paperwork.

"It's Squall! He...oh fuck..." Zell slumped against the wall and began to cry. 

"He what?" Quistis asked anxiously, "Zell, calm down. Tell me what happened."

Zell took a deep breath, and wiped his eyes. Then he told her exactly what had happened, struggling to keep his voice under control.

"Oh shit,' Quistis said, "Zell, go down to the infirmary, you need some rest. And tell Dr. Kadowaki to go to Squall's dorm." Zell nodded and left the office.

End of Chapter.5

Author's notes: hehehe....I killed my favorite character. I'm so evil ^_^ *Looks around* 

....................WHAT!? Anyway, read and review.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: If I owned ff8, do you really think I'd waste my time writing fanfics ?

Author's notes: I didn't think I'd actually get this up today. I managed to delay it in every way possible. Once I even deleted half of it. But it's here.

Fatal Misunderstanding

Chapter 6

Quistis walked quickly down the hallway towards the dorms, still trying to believe what Zell had said. She wanted to think it was all a sick joke, but the way Zell had suddenly began crying told her otherwise. 

It was all her fault Squall was dead. She had always tried to protect him, like a mother or a big sister. She had always tried to get him to open up a bit, and said she'd be there if he needed her. But she had lied. Squall had obviously needed someone then, someone to help him with whatever problem had been bad enough for him to end his life. But she hadn't been there. No one had. A tear dripped down her cheek as she approached the dorm. Irvine was standing in front of the door, looking confused. 

"Rinoa's in there," he told her, "I heard her crying, but Zell told me not to go in. What's going on?"

There was no time for tact. "Squall killed himself," she told him, and Irvine's face paled. Both of them entered the room, locking the door behind them to prevent curious students from walking in.

When they got into the room, Quistis went over to Rinoa, who was sitting on Squall's bed, crying softly. "Rinoa?" Why don't you go down to the infirmary ?" Quistis said gently. Rinoa, too upset to protest, stood up. Her knees gave way and she almost fell, but Quistis grabbed her.

"Irvine, I'm going to take Rinoa down to the infirmary." she told the cowboy, who was staring at the closed bathroom door. He nodded, not meeting her eyes, ands she knew he was crying. She helped Rinoa walk and led her to the infirmary.

~*~

Irvine barely heard Quistis leave. He was still trying to make sense of what she had said. Why would Squall kill himself? It didn't make sense. He had to have proof, or he wouldn't believe it. He reached out and slowly opened the bathroom door.

The sight of Squall's body almost made him throw up. He hadn't been as close to the antisocial commander as Zell, but they had still been good friends. He had looked up to Squall, always admiring the way he could handle anything. But now as he looked at Squall's face, he saw that they had all been wrong. Squall's usual scowl had been replaced with a look of confusion and fear, as if he had suddenly decided not to die. His eyes, which had once shown fierce determination, and never once revealed his true emotion, now, even in death, looked sad and lost. It was as if right before he died, Squall's mask had slipped, revealing the person behind it. 

But it was the indignity of having his friend and commander, respected by hundreds, lying in a bathtub in only his boxer that really bothered Irvine. It wasn't right, and it felt disrespectful to just leave him there.

Carefully, Irvine reached down and picked up Squall's body, which lay limp in his hands. He laid Squall on the bed, and folded the blanket over him, making a sort of shroud. "Squall, I'm sorry," he told his friend, mentally scolding himself for talking to a corps, but at the same time feeling it was necessary, "I should have been there. We all should have. Whatever was wrong, you could have told us, we would have understood."

There was a loud banging at the door, "Kinneas! Open this door now!" shouted a voice. 

Irvine tried to place the voice, "Seifer?" he asked.

"You're damn right it's me! Now open the fucking door!" Seifer shouted. Irvine unlocked and opened the door, but before he could tell Seifer to go away, the blonde gunblade expert had pushed past him into the room.

~*~

Seifer hoped to god that what he'd been hearing wasn't true. People in the cafeteria had been saying that Irvine was guarding Squall's room because the commander was hurt, or possibly even dead. No one knew anything for sure, but Seifer had to find out.

If Squall was dead, it would ruin his life. Ever since the orphanage, Seifer had regarded Squall as a rival. When Ultimecia had been killed and Seifer came back, hoping to make up for what he had done, Quistis had seen he was sincere and allowed him to stay. Now he was a SeeD, having finally passed him exam. Although they rarely spoke to each other, and neither of them had time for the battles which had been a part of daily life in the past, the rivalry was still there. Without it, Seifer didn't know what he would do.

When he entered the room, Seifer stopped short in complete shock. 

He slowly walked over to the bed, where Squall lay wrapped in a blanket. His worst fears had been confirmed.

Spinning around, Seifer grabbed Irvine by the shirt collar. "How the hell did this happen?" he demanded, trying to keep his voice under control.

"He...he killed himself," Irvine told him, and Seifer released the cowboy in shock.

"You're lying," he said, his voice hardly more than a whisper. "You're fucking **_lying_**!" But Irvine, who was crying without even realizing it, showed him Squall's wrists.

Seifer turned and left the room, unable to stand it anymore. He and Squall had been fighting ever since he could remember. There had been times where Seifer had said he would kill Squall, and times, when under the sorceresses control, that he had actually tried. But at the sight of his rival's body, lying on the bed, never to fight again, he had realized that he had never really hated Squall. It hurt, to realize something after it was too late to do anything about it. 

Seifer's eyes drifted over to Hyperion, lying on a shelf above his bed. How many times had he and Squall been involved in fierce gunblade battles? How many times had he tried to hurt Squall using Hyperion, and never realized that in the end, it would be Squall's gunblade, and not his, that would take his rival's life? Seifer couldn't hold it in anymore. Falling to his knees on the floor, he began to cry.

End of chapter 6

Author's notes: $hit! FFN isn't coming up! So this mite be a bit late, despite what I said earlier. Hopefully not though. LOL, Peewee's Gurl, my best friend (and a really great author too), slept over last nite. We went to bed at 6:30am, and I woke up at nine. Add that to the fact that the most sleep I've gotten any night in the past week is four hours, and you have one very tired author. But I'll still try to have the 7th chapter up tomorrow. There will be AT LEAST eight chapters now, because I'm having fun writing this ^_^ 

****


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own FF8 or any of it's characters. I'm considering asking Squaresoft to sell me the rights to the coffee mug on Squall's roommate's shelf. (Really)

Author's notes: I don't like this chapter, but oh well, the next one will be better. And as far as I know, it's going to be ten chapters. Well, nine and an epilogue.

Fatal Misunderstanding

Chapter.7

The next day, before dawn, Quistis sat at her desk, trying to make sense of the entire ordeal. . She had contacted Laguna Loire last night and told him. Squall's father would arrive at Balamb garden in a few hours, and in forty five minutes, she would make the official announcement that Commander Squall Leonhart, possibly the most respected person in Balamb garden, or in any of the gardens for that matter, had died. There had been rumors going around since the time Zell and Rinoa had found him, but no one really knew whether or not to believe them. Of course, she wasn't going to mention the suicide, although she knew it would leak out eventually.

Last night had been the worst night of her life. She, Zell, and Irvine had sat in the instructor's lounge, talking quietly, and occasionally crying. Selphie and Rinoa had both been admitted into the infirmary. Selphie had cried for two hours straight, before finally falling asleep, and was still having trouble coping. She had to be given tranquilizers to keep her from lapsing into complete hysteria. But they all agreed Rinoa's condition was worse. She simply sat on the bed, holding Squall's ring in her hand and refusing to talk to anyone. Dr. Kadowaki had said it was the worst case of depression she'd seen in her entire career. 

The worst thing was that, although they knew how he had killed himself, and an approximate time of death, nobody had any clue why Squall had chosen to take his life. There had been no note. Zell and Irvine were going to go through his dorm later and look for clues, but Quistis doubted they'd find anything. There was something bothering her. It was as if she had forgotten something important, something that might help them figure it out. But no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't seem to remember.

Looking at her watch, Quistis saw that the students would all be assembled in the cafeteria for breakfast. Turning on the intercom, she announced, "Attention all students and instructors. This is Headmistress Quistis Trepe speaking. I'm afraid I have something upsetting to tell you......"

~*~

Zell watched the faces of the people in the cafeteria as Quistis talked. "Commander Squall Leonhart was, at eight thirty three last night, pronounced dead by Dr. Kadowaki." Silence engulfed the cafeteria so quickly it was as if the entire student body had suddenly been set to mute. "Due to this tragedy, classes will be cancelled until further notice. Grief counselors will be available, and I'd advise you to go to the infirmary to talk to them if you feel you need assistance coping with this. Although the actual funeral will be held in Esthar, there will be a memorial service in two days to honor his memory. That is all."

When Quistis turned off the intercom, the silence lasted another second or two, although it felt like much longer to Zell, before people began to react. Almost all of the students looked crushed, as if Squall had been their father or something, Zell thought, And it made sense. After all, a lot of the students at Balamb garden didn't see their parents for months. The instructors were not only teachers, they were role models and guardians as well. Pretty much every SeeD and aspiring SeeD in Balamb garden had looked up to Squall.

But Zell noticed one person who wasn't upset. TJ Monroe, the brother of Zell's favorite student, was looking smug, as if Squall's death was a victory for him. Zell knew that TJ had tried to master the gunblade, but quit after realizing that being the son of a Trabian government official would not get him special treatment in Squall's class. It was no secret that he had hated the Commander ever since.

"Good," TJ was telling his friends, "Now maybe we'll get a decent commander. I swear, all Leonhart was good for was bossing people around and fucking Heartilly." 

Within seconds, Zell had TJ pinned up against the wall, "That kind of disrespect can get you expelled," he told the youth, "In fact, it could even get you killed."

"What's that supposed to mean?" The boy asked, sneering at him. "And put me down, or I can get you fired." 

"It means," Zell told him, "That you better watch what you say. And you also better hope I forget about this before classes come back in session. 'Cause if I don't, I'll do everything in my power to get you expelled."

He released TJ and watched as he walked out of the cafeteria, thoroughly subdued. He had never threatened a student. Outside of class, he had never even laid a finger on one. But TJ had deserved it. 

After seeing that that two other instructors were Zell left the cafeteria. Laguna would arrive at Balamb in ten minutes, and if was his job to meet him. He didn't know if the president of Esthar would be calm, or hysterical, or even whether Quistis had told Laguna how Squall had died. All he knew for sure was that he wasn't looking forward to it. 

~*~

As the plane began to descend, Laguna finally looked up from the magazine in front of him. He had been staring at the same page the entire time. The magazine was weapons monthly. It was a special gunblade issue, published soon after the defeat of Ultimecia, and on page twelve, the page he couldn't stop staring at, was an interview with the person who had made the gunblade a popular weapon, Squall Leonhart. The picture included in the interview was one Laguna knew well. It had been taken during the banquet held for the SeeDs who had saved the world from time compression, and in it Squall was using his gunblade to shield his face form the reporters. But because of the angle, it looked more like he was showing off his skills. 

As he had been staring at the picture, Laguna had been dwelling on one thing. Why was it that the only pictures he had of Squall were ones taken by the media? Of course, the question had a simple answer. Because until a little while ago, he hadn't even known he had a son. And once he found out, his son had wanted as little to do with him as possible. That had all begun to change about a month ago. Squall had even agreed to go to Laguna's forty fifth birthday party, although the year before he would have refused to be seen in the same city as Laguna.

It wasn't fair. He had just begun to think that he might have a chance to work things out with his son, that maybe the two of them could get close, and then this had happened.

He still didn't understand why Squall had done it. Quistis had said that no note or clues had been found, but he couldn't accept that. He didn't have time to think about it right then, but he had to eventually. He couldn't live with the guilt of thinking that maybe the reason had been him. Maybe Squall had decided that if his only family was a moron, there was no point in living.

Kiros and Ward had told him over and over that it couldn't have been his fault. They had given plenty of good reasons, and Laguna knew that there was a ninety nine percent chance they were right, but he just couldn't stop blaming himself. 

The plane landed and the stair were let down. Laguna was the only passenger, having refused to let Kiros, Ward, or any of his bodyguards, accompany him. When he left, Squall's body would go with him, back to Esthar for the funeral. The press had probably been notified by now, and would be clamoring for seats at the funeral, but Laguna had made it clear that no one who was there for any reason other than to honor his son, would not be allowed in.

He got off the plane and into the limo that waited, ignoring the stares from the people at the airport. The drive was only two minutes long, and when they arrived at the gates of Balamb garden, Laguna handed the limo driver a tip, and got out.

He saw Squall's best friend, Zell, waiting at the gates. They shook hands, then Zell said, "President Loire, I can't tell you how sorry..."

"Cut the crap Zell," Laguna replied, 'First of all, you knew him too, it's not just my loss, it's everybody's. Second of all, it's Laguna." 

Zell nodded and asked, "Do you want to go straight to the infirmary or..."

Laguna nodded. He wanted to get it over with as fast as possible. "Yes, lead the way."

End of Chapter Seven

Author's notes: Sorry for the extreme suckiness of this chapter. It was hard cuz I was writing Laguna, but since this is depressing, he couldn't be is normal funny, slightly moronic self. And not a lot of description either. Oh well, next chapter I'll write more details, and possibly from Selphie's point of view for some of it. After all, I've ignored her so far. Almost all of the ninth chapter will be Rinoa's point of view. I'm still trying to decide if anyone else dies. I'll have think about it. Anyway, eight chapter up either tomorrow or Wednesday, depending on whether two certain authors (they know who they are) distract me by talking abut hippos and bacon (trust me, you don't want to know).


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I'm too poor to own anything. And no one will share with me. 

Author's notes: *turns on music* I was gonna work on my fic, until I got high. I was gonna post it sooner, but then I got high. Now this chapter is really late, and I know why. Cuz I got high, becuz I high, becuz I got hiiigh!!!!

In other words, don't shoot me. I'm sorry this chapter took so long to post. I actually wasn't high, I was just WAAAAAAAAAYYYYY to busy. I spent Wednesday and Thursday getting ready for school (only supply shopping, not clothes yet, poor me), and Friday and Saturday were spent babysitting for an adorable, but slightly whiny, three year old :( (and I didn't get paid all that well either). I got maybe three hours of computer time all together since Thursday, and since I had to spend some of that chatting, reading fics, and checking out other sites (yes, HAD to, I was tied in the chair and forced to type urls) Not to mention the fact that I had writer block for awhile. Oh well, at least it's up.

Chapter 8

Selphie looked up when she heard voices coming from the infirmary office. She was feeling better, although the thought that Squall was dead was still hard to believe. Standing up, she steadied herself and walked out of the room. Standing beside Zell was...

"Sir Laguna!" she exclaimed in surprise, "What are you...." she trailed off, mentally yelling at herself for asking something so stupid. "I mean..."

Laguna held up his hand. "Don't apologize. I know it's hard to believe someone like me could be Squall's father." Selphie looked into the eyes of the man she had once had a crush on. Laguna usually looked so happy and energetic, but today he looked tired. As if he hadn't slept in days, which, Selphie reminded herself, was probably likely. She knew she hadn't slept very well since hearing about Squall. But it wasn't just the lack of enthusiasm. Laguna's eyes looked completely lost, as if he was simply an empty body, with no soul or feelings. He looked, she thought, like a man who had lost all reason for living.

Glancing in the mirror, Selphie saw that she looked horrible as well. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and her face was streaked with tear stains. He hair fell limp, and there were stains on her hospital gown from the times she had thrown up or dropped food. She was a mess. But, unlike Laguna's, her eyes didn't look completely void of life. 

'He's lost so much,' she thought. 'First his wife, then his son. He has no family left, unless you count.....' "Where's Ellone," she asked, surprised that Squall's "sis" wasn't here.

"She was on a trip to the Island closest to heaven when this happened," Laguna told her, "She'll be home tomorrow."

Selphie nodded and said, "Well, I guess you have to go see him." She hadn't seen Squall's body, and wasn't planning on it, at least not until the funeral, so she excused herself, and left the infirmary, wanting to take a shower and change her clothes.

She had to pass Squall's dorm on the way to hers, and when she walked by, she heard a noise inside. Who would be inside Squall's dorm? She checked the door, and found it unlocked. Bursting in, she saw the depressed faces of Irvine and Zell.

"Hey Selphie," Irvine said, trying to smile, "Glad that you're outta the infirmary. I'll be over in about half an hour, 'k babe?" Selphie nodded, and left. 

When she opened the door to her dorm, she couldn't help but let out a small scream when she saw someone sitting at her desk. "Quistis?" she asked when she recovered. 

The blonde girl nodded, and Selphie could see she'd been crying, which was no surprise. But what she said next was. "Selphie, I had to talk to you. I think I know why Squall killed himself."

~*~

At the look on Selphie's face, Quistis wondered if perhaps she should have told someone else. But Selphie was Rinoa's best friend. If anyone would know what to do, it was her.

Quistis had spent the entire day going over her encounters with Squall during the week before his death. Then she had finally remembered the one detail that she had been trying so hard to remember.

She had been heading towards the cafeteria for a late lunch, when she had met Squall, going to see her. He had asked for, and been given, the day off. He had also asked about Rinoa. When she had asked if they had gotten in a fight, he hadn't said yes, but he hadn't quite said no either. Could he have been mad enough at Rinoa to kill himself? At first, it had seemed ridiculous, but she was sure it was the only answer. 

She began to tell Selphie her theory, watching as the younger girl's face took on an expression of horror and sadness. When she finished, Selphie told her, " As far as I know, they never really got in an argument, but Rinoa did storm out on Squall during lunch that day. She said it was because...." she stopped, and her eyes grew wide. 

"What?" Quistis asked, beginning to get scared.

Selphie looked up at her, and seemed to be almost in shock. "Rinoa got Angelo put to sleep the same day Squall killed himself. The week before that, she'd been getting pretty depressed about it. Maybe Squall thought she was being like that 'cause she was mad at him....."

She trailed off, beginning to cry, and Quistis sank down into a chair. If Selphie was right, and Squall had killed himself because he thought his girlfriend hated him, it would break Rinoa's heart. "What are we going to do?" Quistis asked, "She's going to figure it out for herself soon, and then she'll be even worse."

"I don't know," Selphie replied through her tears, "would you mind leaving me alone for a while? I'm really tired."

Quistis nodded, and walked out of Selphie's dorm, heading towards her office, wishing she could go to sleep too. She hadn't slept more than two hours at a time since this had started. As headmistress, she had to keep the school running. There was still a lot of work to do, even with classes cancelled.

She reached the office and sank down in her chair. Her mind went back to her conversation with Squall. If that had been the reason, then maybe it had been all her fault. After all, she should have known something was wrong when she talked to him. She should have done something about it before it was to late. But she hadn't. If she had, Squall would probably be training or teaching his class, not lying in the infirmary dead.

"How ironic," she said out loud, although no one was there to hear it, "I always tried to look out for him,. but in the end it's my fault he's dead." 

Someone knocked on her door, and walked in. Looking up, she saw it was Laguna Loire. "Mr. Loire," she began, "I'm sorry I wasn't able to speak with you earlier." She stood up, but he didn't seem to notice. 

"I'm going now," he told her. "The funeral will be five days from now. You, Zell, Rinoa, Selphie and Irvine may stay with me when you arrive if you like."

"Thank you," Quistis told him, "Shall I see you out?" He shook his head, and left. 

Sitting back down, Quistis let her mind drift back over the events of the past few days. There were so many emotions she was dealing with. Along with the sadness, frustration, and pity, she was surprised to realize she was angry. Not at herself, as she had thought, but at Squall. 'Why did he have to be so stupid?' she found herself thinking, 'It's all his fault. And we're all suffering because of it.'

She instantly felt regret for thinking it. Unable to think straight any longer, she lay her head on her desk and began to cry, wondering why her entire world seemed to be collapsing around her.

~*~

The next day went by without anything happening, for which she was grateful, Rinoa seemed to be slowly coming out of her depression, the student body had accepted their commanders death, although those who knew him best were still often found in the company of the school grief counselor. It would be a long time until the Garden would be back to normal, but eventually, it would be.

Soon, it was time for the memorial service. As Quistis put on a simple black dress, tied her hair back, and put on a strand of pearls, she wondered whether she would have the self control to get through her speech. Fixing her lipstick, she left her room, and headed towards the gym.

~*~

Zell looked up as Quistis entered the gymnasium and took her place at the front. She was coping with the tragedy remarkably well, as he knew she had still had feelings for Squall. Despite his own sorrow, he found himself noticing how nice she looked. Even at a time like this, she looked pulled together and composed. Her blonde hair was twisted into a simple yet elegant style, and her dress was fashionable, but respectful. In other words, he thought, she was beautiful.

He snapped himself out of his daze when Quistis began to talk. She spoke for a few minutes about how Squall had been a great commander, a great student, and a great friend. By the end of her speech, quite a few people looked as if they were trying to hold back tears. Then she called Zell up to say a few words.

As he spoke, he wasn't really aware of what he was saying. He had lost his best friend, man who he had always respected and admired, and he knew that, although his speech had the same effect as Quistis's, it didn't really express how he felt. When he left the stage, Quistis gave him a small smile, as if to tell him he'd done good. He returned it, then sat back down, trying to listen to the other speeches, although his thoughts were alternating between the loss of his friend, and his growing fondness for the blonde headmistress.

The service was short. When it was finished, Squall's friends all met in the staff room. The other instructors understood that they needed time off, and were taking care of their duties.

"Rinoa said she need to go shopping for a dress for the funeral," Selphie told them, "I'm going to go with her tomorrow. She seems to be better." Zell noticed her shooting looks at Quistis, and wondered what the two of them knew that he didn't.

"Yeah," Irvine agreed, "She actually cried yesterday. The doc says she'll be ok."

Quistis told them about Laguna offering them a place to stay, and they all agreed it would be good.

"We'll probably only stay there a day or two anyway," Zell said, " After all, we're going to have to start classes soon. SO what are we doing about the press conferences?"

"I'm going to have you take the one in Galbadia, and Irvine and Selphie handle the one in Trabia, " Quistis told him, "I turned the rest of them down."

Soon, Irvine and Selphie left to go get some rest. Zell looked at Quistis. "Well, I guess I should go to," he told her, "Make sure you get some sleep. In fact why don't you take tomorrow off. I noticed you've been working to hard. I could take care of things."

"Would you really?" she asked, smiley tiredly, "I could use some rest I suppose."

"No prob," he told her, smiling, "Have a good sleep." 

He started to walk out, but she stopped him, "Zell?" He looked back, wondering if she was going to ask him why he had been staring at her earlier. 

She opened her mouth, then hesitated and said, "Thanks." He nodded, and left. Despite the sorrow he was feeling, Zell was pretty sure he was in love.

End of Chapter 16

Author's notes: Weird...I kinda zoned out, and when I snapped back into the real world, this fic was turning into a Zistis, or a Quell, or some sort of Zell and Quistis romance thingy! Another weird thing, I just checked my thesaurus, and Quell means to put down, or subdue. Interesting. Anyway, I mostly snapped outta my writers block now, so ch.9 should be up by Wednesday or Thursday. Maybe even Tuesday if I have time. Bye-bye. 


	9. Chapter 9

Author's notes: YAY! I'm done! This is the last chapter. I hate to admit it, but I'm glad. Not that I didn't enjoy writing it and getting reviews, it was just a lot of pressure, always trying to get chapters done quickly, and dealing with the fact that I killed off the hottest guy in video game history (argue and die, especially if you're name's Samantha). Anyways, read my end notes for apologies, thanks, and info on my future fics. Buh bye ^_^

Chapter Nine

Rinoa barely glanced up from her photo album when she heard her door open. Today was Squall's funeral, and she, Quistis, Selphie, Zell, and Irvine were staying at the presidential palace in Esthar. Maids were always coming in and out of her room, bringing her drinks, fluffing her pillows, and asking if there was anything else she needed. She was about to say that she didn't want anything, when she saw that the girl at the door was not a maid, but her best friend.

"Hey Selphie," she said, smiling a bit, "Got bored of the pool?"

Selphie shook her head, "You know I could never get tired of beating Zell in water fights. I just came to see how you were."

"Better." She replied, "It's been almost a week. I still miss him, but I've accepted that there must have been a reason. I was sure it was my fault, but I can't go on blaming myself. It's just that...I loved him Selphie, I really did. I wanted us to get married, have kids, and grow old together. It's just not fair..." she trailed off, and tears rolled down her cheeks.

Selphie gave her a hug and brushed the long dark hair out of Rinoa's eyes. "I know, we'll all miss him. And it's not fair, you're right. But...oh I don't know. There's a reason I became a SeeD and not a grief counsellor you know."

Rinoa smiled, and looked up at her friend. "I know," she told her, "Thanks Selphie." I'll see you this afternoon, 'k?"

Selphie nodded and left the room. When she was gone, Rinoa went back to the album. Her eyes fell on a picture of her, Squall, and Angelo. In it, Squall was giving her a piggyback in the rain, and both of them were laughing. Angelo was in front of them, trying to get Squall to come play in the puddles with him. 

Rinoa smiled as she remembered that day. Squall had eventually given in to Angelo, and chased him through the courtyard, with her clinging to his back screaming, partly in fear of falling, but mostly in excitement. Then he had run out of the garden and into the woods. In the middle of the forest there had been a lake, and Squall had ran straight in, with Rinoa still on his back. The water had been warm, and they had stayed out there until sunset, both of them too much in love to remember the speech he was supposed to be making.

She smiled again. Squall had gotten in a lot of trouble for that, and so had she, but it was her favourite memory. 

She took out the picture and put it on her dresser, then got up. There were only three hours until the funeral, and she had to get ready.

~*~

Irvine knocked on Rinoa's door, feeling nervous. He had to tell her it was time for the funeral. Selphie had told him about Quistis's theory, and now he was worried about Rinoa. If she found out, he was sure it would push her back into her depression. Sighing, he knocked on the door.

Rinoa answered in less than thirty seconds, wearing a simple black dress. Irvine noted that she had Squall ring around her neck, and that she was also wearing the bracelet Squall had given her for their first anniversary. 

"Umm...it's time.." he began, but she cut him off. "I know. Thanks for coming to get me." He was surprised to see that, although her eyes were slightly red, she seemed to be coping pretty well. 

"You're welcome," he told her, "Do you want me to go down with you?"

"No, that's alright," she told him, "You go down, I'll be there in a second, I just need to get something." Nodding, he left, but something didn't feel right. 

~*~

Rinoa closed the door and walked over to her dresser. On it were the two items she had to bring. She glanced at the picture again before slipping it into the pocket of her dress. Then she picked up the second item. She looked at it for a while, wondering if perhaps she should just leave it where it was. But she couldn't. She hesitated one more time before slipping the item into her pocket beside the picture.

~*~

"We are gathered here today to say goodbye to Squall Leonhart, SeeD commander.........."

Zell sighed in irritation. The funeral had just started, and already he had to suppress the urge to run to the front of the room and punch the minister in the face. It wasn't right. His best friend was being remembered in a speech so dull and uninteresting that he might as well have been a goldfish, but at the same time, the crowd at the funeral was so large that it was as if the president of the world had died. And yet, even thought there were so many people there, probably only fifteen or so actually felt sorrow at Squall's death. 

Zell glared over at Seifer, who was sitting near the back. How could he have the nerve to attend the funeral, after all the times he had personally tried to kill Squall? 

He felt someone tap his arm and looked over to see Quistis. "I think Seifer is here for the same reason we are. He and Squall were rivals, but deep inside, I think they were like brothers." 

Zell was always surprised at how Quistis always seemed to know what he was thinking. "You might be right," he told her, smiling a bit. He turned his attention to Rinoa, who was sitting beside him. She was crying quite openly, and he gripped her hand for a few seconds, just to remind her that he was there for her. She looked up at him and mouthed her thanks. 

He nodded, but his heart had just skipped a beat. When their eyes had met, he had seen something in her expression that sent a chill down his spine. He shrugged it off. It had only lasted for a second after all. He'd just be sure to watch her closely when the funeral ended.

~*~

Two hours later, Rinoa was getting annoyed. There was a reception out in the garden, and hundreds of people were walking around, eating and talking quietly. Every minute, someone would approach her to express their sympathy, which she was getting tired of.

She looked over and saw Zell watching her. He was worse than all the others combined. For a fearful moment, she had thought he had discovered what she was going to do. But no one could know. She had only decided that morning, and she had been careful to act as normal as possible.

She needed a distraction. She looked towards Squall's casket, as if expecting to see the answer to her problem. And, surprisingly, she did.

"Quistis," she said, approaching the blonde, "I have a favour to ask."

Quistis looked at her, and Rinoa noted the smudged eyeliner and mascara that indicated she had been crying. "Sure," Quistis replied, 'What do you want?"

"Would you mind talking to Zell for a while? I think he needs some company." 

Both girls looked towards the buffet table, where Zell was, as always, eating hotdogs, although not nearly as quickly, or with as much enthusiasm, as usual. "Why me?" Quistis asked, sounding almost nervous.

"'Cause I think he likes you," Rinoa told her, "And I get the feeling you like him."

Quistis smiled a bit as she replied, "I'll bet you fifty gil he doesn't, but ok." Her expression changed to concern, "But what about you? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine," Rinoa replied, "Or at least, I will be." Quistis nodded, gave her a hug, then left.

Within five minutes, Zell was completely distracted. Rinoa couldn't help smiling at the look on his face, which was a mixture of embarrassment and happiness.

After checking on more time to make sure no one was watching, she walked off into the woods. 

~*~

"So anyway, I was saying to Rinoa..." Zell stopped in mid sentence. Looking around, he saw that there were only about thirty people left. And none of them were Rinoa. 

"Zell, what's wrong?" Quistis asked, sounding confused.

"Where's Rinoa?" Zell asked. She shrugged. "SHIT!" he yelled, so loud that everyone at the funeral shot him disapproving glares. "Sorry," he told them, "Has anyone seen......"

A gunshot rang out, interrupting his speech. 

~*~

"We are gathered here today to say goodbye to Rinoa Heartilly......"

Zell sighed as he listened to yet another goodbye speech, the second in under a week.

He glanced up at the picture at the front of the room. It showed Rinoa, Squall, and Angelo. Tears dripped from Zell's eyes as he remembered that all three of them were gone. He couldn't help but blame Rinoa. She had put Angelo to sleep, she had been the reason Squall killed himself, and then, to make their lives even worse, she had taken her own life.

But then he smiled. He remembered something his grandfather had told him. Although he, Quistis, Selphie, and Irvine would never see them again, they would never be separated from each other. Their love had survived when Squall had been gone for long periods of time on missions, it had survived although Rinoa's father had disapproved, and it would survive now, even when they themselves had not. 

Suddenly, Zell wished he had been in Squall's shoes. He wished he could have loved someone so deeply that he couldn't live without them, and that they would love him back just as much. 

But it would never happen, he told himself, there was no one that special in his life.

"Thank you all for being here," the minister finished. As Zell stood up, he felt a hand touch his. Looking up into a pair of blue eyes, he smiled. 

"What?" Quistis asked, looking confused.

"I just discovered I have something I didn't think I had, " he told her.

"What?" She asked. He didn't answer her, just took her hand, and walked with her towards the exit. 

He had lost two friends, but he had found love. And while time would make his sorrow fade, it could only make his love grow.

The End 

Author's notes: O.o I'm confused. I started out with a nice, angsty fic, and ended up with a romance??? Oh well, at least I got to kill people. At the moment I have a few humour fics in the works, and I'm considering a romance. I just can't decided which pairing. 

Apologies: First of all, I want to apologize to Peewee's Gurl (Samantha) I know I said I'd said this chapter to u before I posted it, but I had to get it up or I would have went crazy. Don't worry, I'll let you read all my other fics b4 I post...I promise. Second, I wanna apologize to everyone who got sick and tired of waiting for new chapters. I know ch.8 and 9 took a really long time, but I have an excuse. You see, when I was born, I was blessed with good looks, intelligence, talent, the ability to make anyone like me by saying "I wuv u" and a million other things that make me so wonderful, BUT to prevent me from being one hundred percent perfect, I was cursed with the dreaded writer's block. And I got it really bad when writing the last few chapters int his story. Sorry 'bout dat. 

Thanks: Ok, this is gonna take awhile. First, I'll thank the people who reviewed. They are: Punk Quistis Trepe, Optical Goddess, Spirit Lovelorn, Lil Angel, Therese, RealllyDumbBlonde (o.O), Peewee's Gurl, and Senric. Thanx u guys, I loved all the reviews. You're all great, and I'll try to read and review some of ur stories when I get the chance (If I haven't already)

Next, the two special reveiwers. Peewee's Gurl and SpiritLovelorn. PWG (Sam),thanx for everything. Can't wait for the next chapter of Remember Me. And btw, wanna hang out later? Spirit, you're great. I love your fics, and I know for a fact that your a nice person too. After all, not many people actually send e-mails thanking me for reveiwing their fics. You guys are both great reveiwiers, great people, and great author's. 

Also, I wanna thank my two wonderful friends, PeeWee's Gurl (Geeze, why don't I just make a PWG thanx section?), and Matt1plus1. Sam, you've helped me so much it's unbelivable. From everything from reveiwing, to editing (although usually not till after I post), to telling me to move my ass and post the next chapter. Matt, well, you'll probably never read this, but you're great too. After all, it's all thanx to Bloodlust (If u haven't read it, read it) that I wrote this. For some reason, it inspired me to kill Squall. And beside Sam, you're probably one of my best friends. Even though I've never met u in real life, and I haven't even known u very long, you're one of the coolest people I know. Say hi to you're hippo for me. Anyway, I luv u guyz. *hugz*

One last thing. It's been five days since the tradgedy in NY. Even though I'm not an american, the feelings of shock, sorrow, and anger are still strong. I want to say sorry for eveyone who was injured or lost loved ones in the attack. Although I'm too young to donate blood,or even help in the volunteer effort, I'll do what I can to help. Whoever did this deserves a punishment worse than anything I can imagine,a dn I hope they're caught soon, so justice can be served. So to any Americans, whether you live in New York, Florida, California,or any other state, even Alaska, I know no words can make it better, but even so, I'm sorry you're being put through this,and I hope you're all safe. 


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